Beemaster's International Beekeeping Forum

MEMBER & GUEST INTERACTION SECTION => HUMOR IS A FUNNY THING => Topic started by: iddee on October 21, 2009, 07:50:58 PM

Title: conservative or liberal ???
Post by: iddee on October 21, 2009, 07:50:58 PM
If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn`t buy one..
If a liberal  doesn't like guns, he  wants all guns outlawed.

If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn`t eat meat.
If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products
banned for everyone.

If  a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to
defeat his enemy.
A liberal wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good.

If a conservative is homosexual, he quietly leads his life.
If a liberal is homosexual, he demands legislated  respect.

If a black man or Hispanic are conservative, they see themselves as
independently successful.
Their liberal  counterparts see themselves as victims in
need of government  protection.

If a conservative is down-and-out, he thinks
about how to better his situation.
A liberal  wonders who is going to take care of him.

If a conservatie doesn't like a talk show host, he switches channels.
Liberals demand that those they don't like be shut down.

If a conservative is a non-believer, he doesn't go to church.
A liberal non-believer wants  any mention of God and religion silenced.
(Unless it's a foreign religion, of course!)

If a conservative decides he needs  health care, he goes about
shopping for it, or  may choose a job that provides it.
A liberal demands that the rest of us pay for his.

If a conservative slips and falls in a store, he gets up, laughs and is
embarrassed.
If a liberal  slips and falls, he  grabs his neck, moans like
he's in labor  and then sues.

If a conservative reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can
have a good laugh..
A liberal will delete it because he's  "offended".



Which are you?
Title: Re: conservative or liberal ???
Post by: beecanbee on October 22, 2009, 12:16:24 AM
Well – I like to say that I am a conservative – but not a Republican.  Too often the two get confused.  This said – I don't think I will be forwarding it, and given that it is in this thread – I would have no way to delete it anyway. :roll:

And of those I know who do identify themselves a liberals – they would take the conservative statements as their own positions, except maybe the last one – so while humorous, not very accurate. :-D
Title: Re: conservative or liberal ???
Post by: iddee on October 22, 2009, 09:18:27 AM
>>>>so while humorous, not very accurate.<<<<

Was it posted under humor or coffeehouse???
Title: Re: conservative or liberal ???
Post by: tshnc01 on October 22, 2009, 09:57:47 AM
Humor....
Title: Re: conservative or liberal ???
Post by: Kathyp on October 22, 2009, 11:00:27 AM
i got that in an email and thought it was pretty accurate!
wait, i know.....the liberal gene and the humor gene are connected.  it's defective in some people  :-D
Title: Re: conservative or liberal ???
Post by: kedgel on October 22, 2009, 10:43:19 PM
Loved it!  All good humor has it roots in real life.
Title: Re: conservative or liberal ???
Post by: beee farmer on October 23, 2009, 01:15:58 AM
 :buttkick: