Run o' the Mill Jokes

[Occam]

Customer approached a worker in a health food store that stocks a pretty good line of all kinds of different specialty honeys

Customer: *holds up jar* ?Excuse me. This honey? is it from free-range bees??

- -

While a customer is eating on the outside patio, she is stung by a bee and has an allergic reaction that requires medical assistance. Later, when she contacts the restaurant requesting to be reimbursed for the medical bills, the restaurant?s representative politely asks:

Rep: ?Did you see the bee that stung you??

Customer: ?Yes.?

Rep: ?Well, was the bee wearing our uniform? And if so, did you happen to get her name from the name tag?? *pause for answer* ?Since she was not one of our employees, there is nothing I can do for you.?

[animal]

A man is staggering and weaving down the street at 3am when he is stopped by the police. The well endowed lady cop asks him where he is going at this hour and the man replies "I'm heading to a lecture on alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as smoking and staying out late."
The cop responds "really? who is giving that lecture at this time of night?"
The man replies "that would be my wife."



Not amused, the cop says, "I'm arresting you for public drunk. Anything you say can and will be held against you."
The drunk replies, "boobies !"

[Salvo]

Let's see if they give me the boot for this one.

A woman comes home and tells her husband, *Remember those headaches I've been having all these years? Well, they're gone.*

*No more headaches?* the husband asks, *What happened?*

His wife replies, *Margie referred me to a hypnotist. He told me to stand in front of a mirror, stare at myself and repeat..... 'I do not have a headache; I do not have a headache; I do not have a headache; ..... It worked!*

*The headaches are all gone?* The husband replies, *Well, that is wonderful.*

His wife then says, *You know, you haven't been exactly a 'Ball of Fire' in the bedroom these last few years. Why don't you go see the Hypnotist and see if he can do anything for that?*

The husband agrees to try it. Following his appointment, the husband comes home, rips off his clothes, picks up his wife and carries her into the bedroom.

He puts her on the bed and says, *Don't move, I'll be right back.*

He goes into the Bathroom and comes back a few minutes later and jumps into bed and makes passionate love to his wife like never before.

His wife says, *Oh Boy! That was wonderful!*

The husband says, *Don't move! I will be right back.*

He goes back into the bathroom, comes back and round two was even better than the first time.

The wife sits up and her head is spinning.

Her husband again says, *Don't move, I'll be right back.*

With that, he goes back in the bathroom. This time, his wife quietly follows him and there, in the bathroom, she sees him standing at the mirror and saying, *She's not my wife. She's not my wife. She's not my wife...*

[BeeMaster2]

😊
And your still on BeeMaster. 🤗