CARP

[GSF]

CARP - Canadian Association of Retired People

Questions and Answers from CARP Forum


Q: Where can single men over the age of 60 find younger women who are interested in them?

A: Try a bookstore, under Fiction.


Q: What can a man do while his wife is going through menopause?

A: Keep busy. If you're handy with tools, you can finish the basement. When you're done, you will have a place to live.


Q: Someone has told me that menopause is mentioned in the bible... Is that true?
Where can it be found?

A: Yes. Matthew 14:92:
"And Mary rode Joseph's ass all the way to Egypt..."


Q: How can you increase the heart rate of your over-60 year-old husband?

A: Tell him you're pregnant.


Q: How can you avoid that terrible curse of the elderly wrinkles?

A: Take off your glasses.


Q: Seriously! What can I do for these crow's feet and all those wrinkles on my face?

A: Go braless. It will usually pull them out..


Q: Why should 60-plus year old people use valet parking?

A: Valets don't forget where they park your car.


Q: Is it common for 60-plus year olds to have problems with short term memory storage?

A: Storing memory is not a problem, Retrieving it is the problem.


Q: As people age, do they sleep more soundly?

A: Yes, but usually in the afternoon.


Q: Where should 60-plus year olds look for eye glasses?

A: On their foreheads.


Q: What is the most common remark made by 60-plus year olds when they enter antique stores?

A: "Gosh, I remember these!"

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